Get out of your own way.
I’ve been told “no” a lot this year. Bring on a partner? “No.” Big new client?” No.” Long-term project? “No.” It’s only the end of Q1 and “no” is a word I’m becoming far too familiar with. It’s a word that in 2022 I didn’t hear that often- in fact- I had about a 92% closure rate. One in twelve barely made me blink.
I’ve been struggling with “No.” It’s uncomfortable. It’s frustrating. And, frankly, it’s a little scary. It’s not that I’m not winning business- I am. I’m writing this blog post from the Charlotte airport after a week away with a client. I’m paying the mortgage (no need to worry, Mom.). But as a small business owner this season is just markedly harder than the last. And I feel it. It’s in the hesitation of my steps. It’s in the tone of my confidence. It’s in my internal dialog.
I watched an interview with Kerry Washington recently where she described balancing her faith and her work. She worked to a comfortable balance after discovering a notion she got from the book The Artist Way by Julia Cameron. She says “It’s mine or it’s not. You pray to catch the bus and then run as fast as you can. Because then if you miss the bus- it’s not your bus. You can’t pray to catch the bus and then stroll down the street. If you don’t run- it could have been your bus. And if you don’t pray- it could you have been your bus. So, I try to do both. All of my work. All of my faith. Rejection is God’s protection. It’s mine or it’s not.”
I’m a reader. I almost always have a book in my bag. And this week I’m reading Hero on a Mission by Donald Miller and in a passage that felt particularly familiar he writes about the victim dynamic. He says; “I often wonder if people pray for rescue and then resent God for not helping them, only to realize, in time, that God did not rescue them because they did not need to be rescued. They were not actually victims.”
Believer or not – Washington and Miller both make great points worth consideration. As a Believer, they make you turn inside out in prayer seeking the courage to face yourself. To question if you’re using your God-given agency to take responsibility for your situation and do something about it.
I was ignoring my intuition. I was pretending that the slow in requests would pick up and the track record of “No’s” would slow down. It was a bad decision to ignore it. Now that we’re headed into Q2, I can’t ignore it any longer .
What would I advise a client? Get out of your own way.
Most of the time when we’re stuck, it’s because we know the way forward, but it feels hard, or it doesn’t fit into our prescribed vision of the future. You might handle this differently, but I default to inaction. I work best under pressure and those first 6-8 weeks of the year were uncomfortable but not concerning. I waited it out to see if things would course-correct instead of beginning the task of figuring out my next move.
How to get out of my own way.
Step 1: Admit that I’m in the way. Create the pressure I need to take the next step. (Run)
Step 2: Figure it out. (Run)
Ask the hard questions – and write the answers down. It isn’t enough to marinate on the following questions. If I’m going to confront it, I need to see it on paper, preferably sticky notes on a wall but that might just be me.
Why did my success rate drop?
What value am I providing to keep clients engaged?
How can I serve clients in a more convenient way?
How do new clients find me?
What opportunity do I have to create passive or steady contract income?
What’s my marketing strategy and is it working?
What services can I provide that I’m not currently?
What am I waiting to do because I’m too scared to try?
What worked before that I’m not doing anymore?
What am I afraid of?
Step 3: Get to work. (Run)
When I can see the answers staring at me from my dining room wall, I can start processing how to tackle them. The same way I would with a client, I start to organize the chaos.
What do I know how to fix? Tackle high value, low effort tasks first. Move low value, high effort tasks to a “nice to do list” to tackle another day .
What do I need to learn how to fix? Move to a parking lot list organized by value and effort as with the other tasks. Then start reading, looking for support and asking for help.
From here, I organize by who can take on these tasks. I’m a boutique consulting firm so some things I can’t let go of. My craft is where I provide value to my clients. It is not something I will compromise. Public facing, I’m a one-man band. But that’s not my reality. I hired an exceptional Operations Assistant this year so I’m not in this alone. Where can I leverage her talents over mine? Who else might I tap to utilize their expertise?
Finally, create a deadline. Make it an aggressive one. It’s time to get moving.
It’s not rocket science -- it’s a decision matrix. One I teach for a living.
Step 4: Ask God for creativity, wisdom, peace, and courage. But not for rescue. (Pray)
I don’t need God to rescue me on this one. I’m praying to catch the bus and running as fast as I can. I am not a victim. I’ll save my rescue for something that I can’t sticky-note my way out of.